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Telegraph: Naked man caught 'having sex' with Land Rover


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#1 Rocket

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Posted 12 September 2013 - 05:45 PM

I'll start this Discovery I made here seeing as his mates have already started us off on the puns...

 

A naked man was caught 'having sex' with a Land Rover parked on the street.

 

land-rover_2667844b.jpg

 

A court heard how drunken Daniel Cooper, 24, was stripped off and started grinding against the blue 4x4 Land Rover Discovery.

 

Cooper was caught on CCTV simulating sex with the Land Rover which was parked outside a takeaway restaurant.

 

Cooper said he was so drunk he could not remember what happened until he was shown the CCTV pictures.

 

Father-of-three Cooper – described as normally being "a caring family man" – stripped off during a drunken night out with friends.

 

A court heard that earlier shocked revellers had seen him simulate sex with the counter of the kebab shop.

 

Cooper was also seen laying on the floor of the takeaway to simulate sex – with his trousers around his ankles.

 

Prosecutor John Wylde said: "First of all he was seen to be urinating.

 

"He was then seen to go down the High Street with his trousers around his ankles and his T-shirt pulled up over his head.

 

"Cooper was waving at cars and then took off his shirt completely.

 

"He was seen to enter a kebab shop where he was simulating the sex act against the corner of the counter.

 

"At one stage he lay on the ground and simulated the sex act. Then he did the same to a Land Rover Discovery vehicle which was parked nearby."

 

Police arrested Cooper in the town centre at Holywell, North Wales.

 

He told officers he was not used to drinking and had gone out with only £13 in his pocket on the night of August 18.

 

Cooper, of Springfields, Holywell, admitted indecent exposure when he appeared at Flintshire Magistrates Court sitting at Mold.

 

He was given a three-month community order which bans him from going outdoors between 7pm and 7am on Friday, Saturday and Sunday nights for the next three months.

 

He was also ordered to pay £85 costs.

 

Gary Harvey, defending, said: "My client is mortified and totally ashamed. He cannot recall what had occurred.

 

"He is a responsible family man who looks after the children while his wife went out to work."

 

The registration number of the Land Rover Discovery was not released to the court.

 

Cooper has changed his name to "Daniel Hotcock Cooper" on his Facebook page since being arrested.

 

His sex act with the counter of the kebab shop was filmed by some of Cooper's friends but was later deleted.

 

One of his pals said: "Daniel will never live this down – everyone is saying he was 'tyred' and 'exhausted' afterwards.

 

"He is not a pretty sight when naked. We all felt sorry for the Land Rover and hope it wasn't offended."

 

 

 

http://www.telegraph...Land-Rover.html



#2 operationfirestorm

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Posted 12 September 2013 - 05:57 PM

First it was a guy having sex with horses or something last week, now a guy and a landrover! what next a PLANE! :w00t:  At least this time he could use alcohol as the excuse. oh boy... :whistle:



#3 GeneralGinger

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Posted 12 September 2013 - 05:58 PM

He certainly did put his key in the ignition



#4 pottheed

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Posted 12 September 2013 - 06:03 PM

I hope he used his finger to get it started before



#5 TallGuy

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Posted 12 September 2013 - 06:08 PM

*
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Did he have fore by fore play. :p



#6 Rocket

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Posted 12 September 2013 - 06:10 PM

Did he have fore by fore play. :p

 

Yarp, winner so far!  :prone:



#7 PC MacTablet

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Posted 12 September 2013 - 09:00 PM

They need some SIA door staff. 'Sorry sir you are barred from entering this Disco'

#8 Dave SYP

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Posted 13 September 2013 - 06:27 AM

Headline:  "Land Rover molested by Randy Lover"  :whistle2:  :D

 

...* gets coat.



#9 Jake CE

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Posted 13 September 2013 - 04:16 PM

He was obviously polishing his headlight.



#10 Rocket

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Posted 13 September 2013 - 04:26 PM

Headline:  "Land Rover molested by Randy Lover"  :whistle2:  :D

 

...* gets goat.

 

Fixed that for you  :aok:



#11 Sappmer

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Posted 13 September 2013 - 08:22 PM

I used to live there.... it was a pretty weird place...



#12 Dave SYP

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Posted 14 September 2013 - 09:18 AM

His tail pipe may become exhausted.

 

*coat is on and running.



#13 Jeebs

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Posted 15 September 2013 - 02:22 PM

If it were a Defender, I could understand......

#14 Cuddles

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Posted 15 September 2013 - 03:59 PM

I would have given him a 90 day sentence, or maybe 110... :whistle:



#15 PlodPoster

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Posted 15 September 2013 - 10:05 PM

Looks like he got a good ride

He must have been wheely randy but then again I can understand

#16 jvt1

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Posted 16 September 2013 - 06:18 AM

he's landied in troubled over this!

#17 JuDgE mEnTaL

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Posted 16 September 2013 - 07:56 AM

I doner what to make of this!






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